I'm losing my colors and at this point I don't even care

I've been losing them for a few months now...since I go home...as I started to lose them I started wondering if it was all in my head so I started reading email after email after email about it looking to see if it happened to anyone else...and indeed it does. They cite several reasons for it...stress, depression, deep sorrow, lose of a love one, confusion, unsurity, insecurity...everything I've been trying to deal with. Last night I completely lost them...I mean they are still there but all I see is black and white...no vivid orange or lush green...not even the ughly colors. I feel so empty now. Everyone says that they come back...but I don't know if I would even want them back...somedays it seems so overwhelming that I wish it would go away. I do miss the comforting feeling that I got with them...like a constant friend that never changed.